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Do the Klutz (Epic Putz Remix)

from Secret Handshake by Headsnack

/

lyrics

I'm a klutz, i'm not a putz I'm a yutz
i kick shmucks like Lionel Hutz in the nuts
I'm a spiller, I'll turn around and bump your Miller
kill the vibe, vilified like Ben Stiller
I'm a spaz, a gawky awkward contrast
modest, unpolished & tarnished with a checkered past
Time to recap, I'm a klutz flicking butts
out the front window and into the back
catch a heart attack from the smoke in the rear view
going 80 on the Clearview, I'm burning holes in upholstery
Clean up aisle 9 in the grocery
That's my story, i'm a blunderer
a butcher, a fumbler
a bull in a china shop stumbler
butter finger half steppin' like Frank Drebin
unsuspecting, stand and bang my head in

Do the klutz, do the klutz
This Is hotcakes & coconutz
hear my ear worms burrow
in your goose bumps
your goose bumps
pumped like puma pounce on a pond of ducks
(repeat)

on a flight with the first class upgrade
rocking free vodka til I'm slow on the uptake
hands spaz spilling drinks on a stranger's lap
Then I order another and take a nap.
oh I'm sorry
I'm clumsy, heavy footed lumbering
thundering, mongering, clodhopper pummeling
smooth talking until I'm knocking
over my glass, I'm overtly brash
remote control dropping,
watching it like a car crash smash
into comcast trash
walk into walls, bang myself in the balls
Burn myself and curse my selfworth

Do the klutz, do the klutz
This Is hotcakes & coconuts
hear my ear worms burrow
in your goose bumps
your goose bumps
pumped like puma pounce on a pond of ducks

A regina steamer carpet cleaner? Dream on!
When I have my lean on, best to call Fema!
I spill tea on a regular basis
and make a mockery of my homeostasis
a hypocrisy that I'm so graceless
yet blaze through phrases with an ageless greatness
unstableness like a turntablist
trying to juggle heavy metal on a leaky vessel
hello surroundings,I'm forgetful
my head has constant knots like a pretzel
my limbs have turrets & beget accidents
like pachaderms snacking on laxatives
banging into things, spilling beverages
stepping on toys getting foot hemorrhages
headphone cords yank over My Chivas
It’s like a penchant to drench when I'm oblivious
asleep at the switch I bitch more than Darth Sidious!

Repeat Chorus

I drench my Qwerty when it's beer thirty
carpet stays dirty cause I'm Topsy-Turvy
Kick my drink like a Rockette then curtsey
grab a jiz rag, & clean it as a courtesy
it's inevitable when I'm drinking several
or sober, I'll still knock it off the coaster
it happens often, mid-motion I balk
and caution to the wind, I shadowbox my drink
hard to think when I'm spilling drinks in public
at the restaurant table while talking dumb shit
space cadet graceful as a savage
chaos magnet banging my head on cabinets

credits

from Secret Handshake, released October 5, 2018
Produced by Golden Kitchen
Written by Headsnack

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Headsnack New York, New York

Hip Hop cyber-pirate from the future spraying intelligent songs that mock humanity while implanting infectious ear worms. Help spread this virus on your mobile devices & be sure to search YouTube for Headsnack! Like us @ Facebook.com/headsnack & follow @headsnack. ... more

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